5 Ways to Cope with Cheating as a Successful Woman
Fri, 11/09/2012 - 4:26pm | by Marcelina Hardy
When a husband cheats on his wife, her whole world comes crashing down around her. If you can picture it, it's as though she's inside a brick building – her life. Once a structure that used to be strong, stable and secure, it's now one that is starting to crumble. She's on her knees, arms curled around her chest and head down to protect herself, while her life is just falling, brick by brick around her. Some of the bricks fall around her as she winces and some hit her body and hit it hard. She can't get up, but at times, she lifts her head to look around. The devastation is too great to bear though, so she buries her head awhile longer.
If you've dealt with infidelity, you've probably felt this way. If you haven't experienced it, chances are you know someone who has, so you know how devastating it can be for someone.
It's not something you can take a hit from and get up with ease. It's not something you can turn the other cheek to and quickly forgive and forget. This is the love of your life taking a knife and stabbing you with it multiple times.
I would be lying if I said that it takes a strong woman to cope with infidelity, because it takes an extraordinarily strong woman. Put yourself in the brick building with the fear of it physically falling on you and you have the strength of someone going through infidelity.
What happens though when you can't get on your hands and knees and hide from life? What if you have a career that you've worked at for years that will come crashing down as well if you can't get up?
These are the questions that successful career woman face as they face infidelity - the ones who stare at the devastation of their marriage and then fear the same for their career as the backlash. For these women, I have these 5 tips to make it as a successful career women in spite of infidelity.
Tip #1: Clear Your Work Schedule
As soon as you find out about the affair, deal with your initial shock but then make calls to ensure that all business is taken care of for at least the next week or two. You will need a great deal of time to take care of yourself and the business of your life so you will need others to take care of your work.
Tip #2: Lower Your Productivity
Lower your productivity and explain the reasons why to the appropriate individuals. You don't need to broadcast to everyone in the world that your husband has cheated on you. However, it's good that the ones who matter most know that you are having personal issues that you need to tend to emotionally and mentally.
Tip #3: Don't Put Other's People's Jobs in Jeopardy
Don't put other people's jobs in jeopardy because of the pain you are in. For example, if you have a project due with someone and you are unable to keep up your end of the bargain, don't blame the other person for the project not being done.
Tip #4: Don't Take Shortcuts
If you can't do your job, don't take shortcuts that are considered fraudulent just so you can get by. This will only lead you to further serious problems in the near future, which you do not need.
Tip #5: Take Care of Yourself
Take care of yourself as much as possible now so you can take care of your career successfully later. Infidelity recovery is about healing yourself from the inside out and that means you'll need some extra time to yourself. Don't try to ignore the situation by overloading your schedule with work because it will only cause you problems with your love life in the future and it could cause you problems in your career later as you deal with repressed issues.
Bonus Tip: Isolate Infidelity to Stay Successful
Always remember, infidelity attacks one area of your life – your marriage. While it affects your emotional and mental well-being, it merely hampers other areas of your life. Don't allow the infidelity to attack them and devastate those too. Isolate the infidelity to your marriage and continue with your career, lowering your responsibilities as needed to cope with the emotional and mental healing. You owe it to yourself and your future to continue being the successful woman that you are and will continue to become.
Marcelina Hardy, MSEd is a relationship coach specializing in infidelity recovery. Visit her website to sign up for a free copy of her latest report, Is He Cheating On You? Know the signs, avoid the mistakes and start the healing process of cheating to save your marriage.