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Lessons in Success: #10 Expand your Network

Wed, 04/11/2012 - 8:55pm | by monicadear

This is one of a series of "lessons on success". This particular lesson is very important to me and ties in with the idea that we all work, live, and share in concentric circles of community.

Your current circle of friends determines to a large extent:

1) your ability to find work, leads, or referrals

2) your income and expenses (we are typically within 15% of the net worth of those in our peer groups)

3) your invitations to gatherings, events, and celebrations

So, if our current circle of friends is where we're currently at, then one way to increase our abilities and our understanding is to "push" a little bit and find someone who is out of your "comfort zone."

For example, since I started focusing on my own personal development, I've increased my circle of friends who are into finance and investing: this has helped tremendously!

  • My hedge fund manager friends, who work exclusively with accredited investors, talk about short and long stocks, trends in the market, and different industries: ideas that I didn't have an opportunity to discuss with my non-finance friends.
  • My multi-millionaire friends, who have made their own money, talk about their latest ventures, the companies they're investing in, and their hobbies: which give me more of a comfort level of understanding their lifestyles.
  • My web developer friends, who are more heavily into programming than I am, talk about the newest technologies they are using, and the tools they're creating: their discussions give me new resources to find and help me improve my own game.

I've also increased my ability to interact with people: believe it or not, even the most successful person that you know has their own moments of self-doubt, fear, and anxiety. Now that we all recognize that these are commonly-enough held emotions, we release them and we can go in search of solutions, opportunities, and ways to connect.

Are you interested in being the best that you can be, achieving your full potential, and unlocking the keys to your own success? If so, find others who are at the top of their game: these are individuals who are the very best at what they do: they are maestras and maestros. Once you find these individuals (and make sure they're not "poseurs"), make sure to take time to interact with them, learn from them, and share with them. If you feel a little uncomfortable, or if you think -- whoa! -- there's no way I'll talk to (insert name of whichever person you're looking to as a role model), then find someone just a little bit less intimidating, and see what you can do to understand, foster connections, and build bridges of understanding with that individual. You'll soon find yourself feeling more and more comfortable in your own abilities, and you'll re-discover your own mastery of your own unique gifts and talents.

Reach out to your community. The very people you are seeking are also seeking you, and I'm sure you'll make some great, lasting, lifelong friendships. Here is my yearly affirmation that I'd like to share with you: feel free to use it or change it for your own search.



  • The top twenty people I spend time with are positive, supportive, healthy, creative and abundant.
  • I enjoy my fulfilling relationships with friends, associates, clients, and partners.
  • My circle of relationships also benefits each other.
  • I am part of a great referral network with many positive power partners.
  • I feel pride and excitement at the energy and positive social change my community creates.


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