Today’s guest post is by Liz Agnew, coaching superstar.

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How to Network Successfully as an Introvert: Four tips to have fun and get results

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by Elizabeth J. Agnew, MS, PE

For us introverts out there, the idea of networking doesn’t exactly get our blood moving. As networking becomes more and more an integral part of my professional growth, I’m finding that (and I never thought I’d say this) I am actually beginning to enjoy it. And that right there is half of the reason why I’m successful with my networking efforts. In this article I’ll share with you 4 tips for networking success – as an introvert!

First, let’s get something cleared up. Being an introvert does NOT mean that you lack social skills. I’ll repeat: being introverted does not mean that you aren’t a ’social’ being. We all are. It simply means that you get your energy from within – when you need to recharge, you find a way to be alone. Being around people tends to use our energy, rather than charge it up. That’s all.

So all you closet introverts can come out now. If you can embrace your introversion, you’ll see that there are true benefits to being one: you tend to have a better relationship with yourself, appear more grounded and aware, and value deeper connections, to name a few. Embracing your introversion means you’ll be able to leverage it in networking situations. The 4 tips below show you how.

1. Think quality, not quantity
Already, your being an introvert is advantageous. Because we tend to prefer fewer, deeper relationships rather than multiple casual acquaintances, we can bring that desire into a networking situation. No one said the key to networking successfully was to get as many business cards as you could in the least amount of time. If you’re having a great conversation with someone, then stay put!

Let your goal be to make one solid connection for the evening that you’ll want to continue into the future. If it’s a multiple-day event, make your goal 3 – 4 solid connections. Now you can relax – let go of the need to compete for contacts and let fate do its work in deciding the few people you’ll get to truly know.

2. Stay curious
Introverts tend to prefer intimate, deep conversation rather than superficial small talk, which is one we reason we are typically allergic to networking. But how to come up with things to talk about that will get you past the small talk smoke screen? This is why I used to get stuck in the “I don’t feel like going” rut. I got out of it by staying curious.

Human beings are naturally curious creatures, and so once you learn to listen to your inner curiosity, it will be your ally in carrying the conversation. The person you’re chatting with has a story, has richness, has a life with details you can’t begin to imagine! Find out about it. Staying connected to your natural curiosity will help you stay drawn to attending and putting effort into the event.

3. Get real
When you’re doing all the curiosity-searching and questioning, make it juicy! Take risks! Dance next to the line – without crossing it. Let this stranger know that you are a real person – sometimes with family tiffs, speeding tickets, and morning breath! It will lighten the mood, foster trust, and be something to help them remember you.

If you’re someone who finds networking boring, this tells me that you need to move WAY closer to this proverbial line I’m talking about. As long as you remain respectful and avoid offending the person, this is what makes it fun. One way to do this is to tell the truth – tell them how you really felt about the presentation, or how business is really going (without being a whino – keep it polite and intellectual). Tell them about your trials and tribulations, or funny mishaps. Keep it short, then ask about them. You break the ice with candor, and invite them to follow suit.

4. Follow up
This is where your efforts can really pay off, or not. The fact that we tend to make fewer, closer connections makes it easier and more comfortable to follow up. Make your follow-up email or card personal to avoid making this process feel too mechanical. If you followed the tips above, you should have an interesting tidbit to cite that will remind you both of your connection.

When you follow up, take initiative in getting to know the person more. I recommend doing this even if you’re not sure you want to – remember, everyone has a story and theirs is richer than you can imagine. If they’re local, meet for lunch or coffee. If they’re too far, send articles or tidbits when they remind you of the person. Simply sending with a note saying “this made me think of you” is enough.

Bonus tip: arrive physically ready. As introverts, this type of engagement tends to use up our energy, so make sure you have a surplus when you arrive! Be well rested, well fed, and well hydrated. And if you notice you’re missing one of those things, excuse yourself for a 5-minute timeout and take care of yourself so that you can focus your energy on your new friends rather than your growling stomach.

Ultimately, networking doesn’t have to feel or be fake. Stay reminded of the original reason people decided to get together: to make connections. Let your goal be to foster true human connection, and do that the best way
you know how.

- Elizabeth J. Agnew, M.S., P.E.

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Liz specializes in leadership development coaching for engineers and other technically minded professionals. Through the coaching process, personal foundation, life vision, relationships, and behavior patterns are explored to leverage strengths and create new effective ways of being as a leader. Coaching happens 1-on-1 usually twice or three times per month.

See packages and rates:
http://www.vgacoaching.com/coaching_packages.htm

Sign up here for a free coaching consultation:
http://www.vgacoaching.com/coaching_try.htm

Nowadays there is so much information in the world. I use del.icio.us to organize all my links into one place.

Because I travel, use multiple computers, and I’m always on the internet, I’ve found that keeping my bookmarks in ONE place is more helpful then spreading them all out.

I used to have my own personal “stash” of bookmarks, but I like using del.icio.us to organize and tag my links. You may also overlay social networking onto the site, by suggesting and receiving links from those in your network.

I use the badge to export my lists of links to other places, like my own business website 10Kwebdesign.com and to my Facebook profile.

The service is helpful, free, and easy-to-use: you simply sign up for an account and install the widget into your browser. When you’re browsing, you may easily “post a link to del.icio.us” and tag it. If you want to keep it private, just mark your link as a private link.

You may also surf to the site and see what other people are visiting and saving to their own del.icio.us accounts.

If you’re looking for a way to organize all your links by subject, category or even chronologically, I recommend this service.

When you, quite literally “write the book” on your topic matter, you become the de facto expert in residence. Therefore, when you truly dominate your subject matter, it’s time for you to share your knowledge in book format.

If you’ve been blogging now, you have a body of work which you will draw from when developing your topic outline for your book.

A typical trade publication focuses heavily on niche material: and if there are others in your field or industry who need your knowledge, a book is a great way to get it to them.

Here are 35 steps to organize your thinking for your masterpiece (and let’s hope this is just the first in a series, because you are so knowledgeable, you will only fit the first part into this volume)

1) First of all, how will your book tie in with your current products and services? This is the beginning of your marketing plan. Who are your competitors? What types of books sell in your field?

2) Brainstorm topics related to your process: Be messy. Develop a big list. Map out all the pieces.

3) Develop an organizational structure or a map of how different sections relate to each other.

4) Crystallize an outline for the book, based on that structure. This is an iterative process.

5) Refine your outline and create chapter headings

6) Collect data, reports, and white papers that relate to your subject matter.

7) Create a list of other “thought leaders” in your field. Find other authoritative texts in your field.

8) Do you need pictures, charts, or tables to illustrate your thinking? Sketch them out so you know what you’ll need

9) Open a word processor document and format the page to 1.25″ left and right margins, 1″ top and bottom margins. Create styles like Heading 1, Heading 2, and Heading 3. Specify your body text to be double-spaced at 12 pt font in Times New Roman or another serif font.

10) Start a “potential titles” list.

11) Begin writing an introduction: tell us who you are, what you’re writing about, and why you feel compelled to write about this topical area.

12) Write an acknowledgements section: who has helped you get to this point?

13) Now it’s time to write. Write each chapter. Write as much as you feel comfortable in each chapter. Then write an additional ten pages for each chapter!

14) Visit the bookstore and Amazon.com. Who else is writing in your field? Anything interesting? Take notes.

15) Write some more. Write regularly and if you feel blocked, do something different until you feel ready to write again.

16) Finish the writing. Decide on the title. Hurray! You have a manuscript.

17) Now it’s time to edit. Print out your work on single-sided pages, set aside a quiet time, and read your book with fresh eyes.

18) Spellcheck your manuscript.

19) Go back to your manuscript and start editing for clarity. Cut passages out if they’re windy or discombobulating. Show, don’t tell. Use action verbs.

20) Have someone develop your tables and charts, as needed. Label them and leave space for where they belong in the manuscript.

21) Get permissions from photographers and other artists for your images.

22) Now it’s time to fact check. Check any outside references and footnote them, if necessary.

23) Edit, this time for readability. Does the passage make sense? Are you explaining a complicated concept in simple terms? Hire an editor for the editing phase.

24) Edit again, this time for grammatical errors. Get rid of hanging prepositions, split infinitives, and dangling gerunds. Do your tenses match?

25) We’re getting close! Have ten of your friends read an advance copy of the manuscript. Solicit their feedback. Listen to their feedback: they are your friends and they want you to succeed!

26) Address reader comments from this review process. Are there any errors or omissions?
Now’s the time to catch them and fix them up.

27) Time for some artistic touches: find a graphic artist to create your cover.

28) Apply for an ISBN number at isbn.org. Some self-publishers will offer this as part of their services.

29) Get your copyright notice into the manuscript.

30) Find your publisher. You may publish the manuscript yourself with a vanity press, you may use a publishing service to print your manuscript on demand (POD), or you may find a large or boutique publishing house that specializes in your type of book. Allow adequate time for the review process. Potential self-publishing options include Lulu.com, CreateSpace.com, and Booklocker.com.

31) Print the book.

32) Receive copies and autograph the first 100. Congratulations!

33) Make sure your marketing materials highlight your book. Add a link from your website and blog.

34) Make a list of interested people and send them complimentary and review copies: encourage them to generate buzz about your book.

35) It’s time to sell, sell, sell!